Greetings

Hello people. Daisy The Cat here.
I thought it was time for an enthralling installment from me, Daisy The Cat. I am not just any cat, I am "The Cat". For those of you who don't know my tale, I am 3 years old and arrived at this new home about 4 or 5 months ago. It has been a long learning curve for the humans in this house, but slowly they are learning my rules!

This business of calling me Crazy Daisy has petered out. I mean who did they think they were; messing with my name? I may not have known my mother for long but, by golly, she taught me the ways of a Burmese and one of those ways is not to let anyone mess with your name!

While they have stopped with the silly Crazy Daisy stuff, they have introduced a new word when introducing me..........emo. "Emo Daisy". I will assume it is part of this funny 'Maori' language the boy human brings home, and perhaps described my colour or status (of which I have made sure is strictly noted as top of the heap thank you very much). Maori has lots of vowels in it, so I chose to be right there. I was rather impressed with the new collar the 'emo' word earned me. It is rather spiffy black with red spikes around it. Ever so flash and slightly tough......which is good as the horrible dogs don't have one so, ergo, I am tougher than them. Which I knew already of course, but they need telling daily. Stupid dogs!

I have started rewarding the alpha female human (AFH) with small amounts of very low key purring. She gets ever so pleased when I do and, as she brings me treats such as sardines, I don't mind the ocassional softening towards her. She serves me well. The alpha male human (PIG) on the other hand is going to feel my wrath very shortly. I am seriously considering depositing my next furball in his shoe. Horrid male turns me upside down onto my back and rubs my stomach. He mutters "You want a nice belly rub?" while doing it. NO I DO NOT! And will he learn? Will he heck.........I spit and growl my displeasure at him, and he laughs. Not nearly good enough in the respect stakes let me tell you! Stupid man!

I have been showing them my skills at hunting. I have brought in several moths now, but for some reason they fall about laughing making statements about "fags" hanging from "washerwomens mouths" or some such statement. Coronation Street (whatever that is) gets a mention while they are laughing and how they should put a scarf on my head with some rollers. It all sounds far too silly and juvenile for my liking, and they are not nearly as impressed as they should be.

I heard the alpha female say to her male hunter that I wanted to be friends with the other cats but just didn't have the skills to make the transition. Pfffft - as if!. By golly humans can be silly. I am friends with the strange little ginger Garfield. He is far too corny to take offence to and just wants cuddles and play. He is good for the early morning game of tag, though he can be a little forward sometimes. The other two cats will bow to my superior will in time. You just see if they don't.

Well, it is time to go and disrupt the sleeping arrangements some more. That is one of my favourite past-times. TTFN.